You're simply leaving for a while, but available to come back if really needed. You're not abandoning or rejecting your child (though they may still feel you are). Leave the room, but come back periodically. The ultimate solution to the problem of getting your toddler to go to sleep on their own involves a compromise between those two extremes. ![]() Is this helping either one of you at all? The Sleep Solution If you let your toddler's crying sway you, if you decide to pick him up again-or maybe even give up for now and try again later-he now knows from experience that if he cries long and hard enough, he will get the relief he wants from you. ![]() You may not have "abandoned" your child, but all the same, you have "rejected" him. Though your toddler may not be as scared as they would be if you left, they certainly won't like it either.įor your one-year-old, it must be torture for you to stay visible but out of reach: to be able to see you, but have you refuse his pleas to pick him up. Because you don't want your child to be scared, you decide to stay until they fall asleep. Again, everything's fine until the night when you "suddenly" decide to put your child to bed before they've fallen asleep. The alternative extreme is almost as bad. Will you entirely abandon your child again? Or will your resolve crumble on the second night-or if not, then on the fifth or 12th? From the moment that you say, "good night," your baby will start screaming and clinging desperately to you. Do you think that it will be easier the next night if only you can stick to your guns tonight? It won't: Sleep will come to be something dangerous and frightening for your child. Is this really fair to your child? Without warning, you've abandoned your toddler totally to their own devices. He may cry and cry, but you stick in the earplugs and remain firm in your commitment to let him "cry himself to sleep," no matter how long it takes. So what happens? One night, out of the blue, you nurse your baby or give him a bottle, say "good night," place him in his crib or bed, and disappear. It's high time that your child learned how to go to sleep without you. Then, suddenly-at least to your child, no matter how gradually it actually took you to come to this point-you decide that you've had enough of this routine. If they later woke up, you just came back to go through the same routine again. Whenever they got tired, you would rock them, sing to them, feed them, and off they went. Try to picture each of these scenarios from your toddler's point of view. Nothing destroys your child's comfort at sleep time more than seeing the bed as a prison. Never use your child's crib or bed as a place of punishment. Do you need to shut out your toddler entirely? Should you stay until they finally drop off to sleep? But when you finally decide your child needs to learn how to go to sleep on their own, you may wonder about the best way to do it. The younger you start encouraging your child to go to sleep by himself, the easier it will be. Here, we offer suggestions at every level. Toddlers need help going to sleep in different ways at different ages. More: One New Mama's Honest Review of Baby Merlin's Magic Sleepsuit Of course, they'll just have to start all over then, again trying anything they can think of. Many parents then concede defeat, giving up until later. That's why it's not at all uncommon for parents to use every trick in the book to try to get their toddler to go to sleep: rocking, cuddling, nursing, feeding, reading, singing, stories, sitting with, leaving, and punishing. What's going on elsewhere around the house? Where are mommy and daddy? What am I missing? Such questions-even if not articulated-consume your toddler's feverish mind. ![]() Your child just has too much that they want to do to welcome rest, no matter how reinvigorating it might prove. Editor's note: This post contains sponsored content.Įven the most well-behaved kids have trouble falling asleep on Christmas Eve because there’s so much excitement! This year, give your child an extra special present that has them looking forward to bedtime with NAMEE’s personalized children’s books.įew self-respecting toddlers will go to bed without a fuss or a fight.
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